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Sunday, May 22, 2005

typing this entry at my hubby's parents' place. Yes after the wedding i'm staying with my in laws. So far so good as there aren't any major hiccups... yet. but staying on the positive side, there are a few things why i do like this place.
1. i just finished off a haagen daz ice cream stick. of all the amazing things in this world, a haagen daz ice cream stick coated with thick dark chocolate that conceals a hazel nut filling and as you tentatively take that chomp, little crackling bits on the surface of the chocolate coat that add texture to the smooth mouthwatering taste of chocolate, is a delight that is all the more sweeter coz it's so unexpected. At this rate, i might just begin to finally put on the weight and keep it there. So in a nutshell, i'm being fed quite well here.
2. i get a cable connection on his computer and it's a reward to my many longsuffering years of dial-up connectivity. Although the electrical nodes on the screen are wonked out and most of the time i just get a blue screen... but HEY... staying positive here.
3. i get to see my dearest, to be with him, to do things together, to enjoy his company.It almost feels like we are still dating but this time, i don't have to worry about curfew hours, about returning home tired and planning our next meeting again. i sleep when i'm tired and wake up sometimes in the middle of the night, just to turn over my heated pillow to a cooler side, and still find my dearest right beside me. It could be that i'm staying with my in laws; that's why i have not been confronted with the full responsibility of being married and leading one united life. All of my bills are taken care of. Dinner is prepared by his mum or dad. One easily replaces the shampoo in the bathroom from a store of it; You don't have to worry that you'll ever run out.

I thank God for all the blessings that i've received... yet at the back of my mind, i worry about being too contented. You might think it strange to say that being contented can be a problem but slowly, i'm realising as i live through the 8th day of married life that contentedness without godliness can be a terrifying thing. Not wanting to play linguistic games here but a strange feeling has been nagging at me ever since i skipped religious classes to manage the affairs of my new flat in sembawang. And today on the train towards orchard, i couldn't help but be reminded of it again. Approaching novena, i noticed an asian girl in a brown knitted cardigan, lycra red spaghetti top, blue jeans with a sparkling cord of twisted blue strings wound around her waist. Then a mormon disciple approached and did the usual business of christianity. I marvel at the boldness of the disciple and the openness that this asian girl had towards a complete stranger whilst pondering on the arguments against mormons.

So orchard station came to view and the two ladies made their exit. I got bored and started to scan my surroundings when i finally realised that the african sitting beside me was completing what seemed like an impromptu study of the 7th commandment "Thou shall not commit adultery". Just observing him, made me desirous to read the bible again; to be serious about the Word and hold it in greater respect, with much more patience and tenacity than i have. I wished i could talk to this man. I wished we could have a conversation on the Word of God and share what we thought we knew. Then being married and just enjoying maritial bliss was suddenly not satisfying to me anymore.

ok can't ramble on anymore. hubby wants to serve ebay for his "treasures". till then..

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