north-american possums! work fatigue grouses; singaporean; ex-poet and writer; former convent girl; converted, convicted and painfully quiet; bibliophilic; skyscrapers; weather-talk; dining alone on sashimi; your life with Jesus; banging heads with problems; looking from afar; loving my xiongmao; peanuts & anchovies; battlestar galatica; novella dreams and paranoai: holding onto you.

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Wednesday, September 17, 2003

i can't smile. the expression on my face is frozen. my lips are so fat because they have not been stretched. it looks like someone stung and sealed my lips together.

not suffering from depression if you're wondering. few nights ago while i was sleeping, my mouth and lips got completely dried up. I woke up the next morning and when i yawned, i was struck by a jolt of lightning pain as i felt the underside of my lips split.

yes, there's a split alright. i feel like i'm going to have 2 mouths soon. today the split got worse coz i most probably talked too much or didn't get enough fluids. so...

i took this as an excuse not to turn up for classes in church. i can hardly eat my dinner without soaking my upper lip in water, waiting for my lips to be plumped, swollen with water...

argh! this could be a punishment for all the insensitive things i've been saying to my babes. all the tantrums i've been pulling off. as a confession, i'm fairly tired and sick of myself for all these emotional ups and downs. i want to get a grip of myself and stop acting so irrationally. my babes and i quarrelled last night till 2am. i spent 40 mins on my handphone talking to him. i woke up with swollen eyelids coz when i cry, my eyes wouldn't know how to shed the excess tears or water and somehow store them that's why they become swollen in the morning. That's my theory, they aint very efficient in taking care of themselves.

so since i'm home early. i better get down to proust. i must conquer the book and start preparing my presentation for next week. i'm tired but i feel like swimming. very strange...

posted by happyhannon at 8:58 PM