north-american possums! work fatigue grouses; singaporean; ex-poet and writer; former convent girl; converted, convicted and painfully quiet; bibliophilic; skyscrapers; weather-talk; dining alone on sashimi; your life with Jesus; banging heads with problems; looking from afar; loving my xiongmao; peanuts & anchovies; battlestar galatica; novella dreams and paranoai: holding onto you.

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Friday, October 18, 2002

my peace of mind is under threat.

- people have been asking me whether i've lost weight. well, i don't exactly check my weighing scales everyday so i always reply "don't know". i feel sensitive. it's like telling a girl that she's put on weight. there is a stigma in being thin and even some guys share this "stigma". i think it's a stigma when people just can't let things be. they have to point out, they have to say something about it to make sure they've got the difference between you and them established. it's sad. i don't think they genuinely are concern about me. if it's my close friend who said this, its ok with me most of the time but if it's just a classmate or stranger..
i've got to have some extra skin ingrafted in me.
- projects. my dad calls it leadership i call it stress. being put incharge of a project is major stressful. i don't like stress because i'm afraid i may lose weight and the reason is perfectly legitimate.

since people have been telling me that i'm too skinny and since they're pushing everyting to me...

why can't i just tell them off?

simple reductive statement... has no balls nor makes sense in real life. i need my peace of mind. i've got to stop worrying and learn to cope with stress levels and take care of my health. what do you think?

anyway the project with the MIA member is going well. everything's about done. we decided to give him another chance. and he's done his fair share of work so... :) things do work out in the end. oh and just something perky for you today. my computer connection was so slow yesterday and it was getting late. i was feeling really tired and wanted to sleep. so i laid hands on my computer and prayed that God would get the connection up to speed and make the circuits and program work. i wasn't thinking whether the prayer was going to work becoz by then i was so desperate, having spent 2 hrs in front of the computer and not getting anything done...

as you guessed.. the computer speeded up! yes no kidding you! after 2 hrs around 12 midnight. i would think traffic is at the highest then, no?

anyway, if my facts are wrong, and it wasn't really a miracle... but by then i was so happy so happy!! thanking God for everything... and it made my day so much better.. :)

posted by happyhannon at 5:28 PM