north-american possums! work fatigue grouses; singaporean; ex-poet and writer; former convent girl; converted, convicted and painfully quiet; bibliophilic; skyscrapers; weather-talk; dining alone on sashimi; your life with Jesus; banging heads with problems; looking from afar; loving my xiongmao; peanuts & anchovies; battlestar galatica; novella dreams and paranoai: holding onto you.

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Friday, October 11, 2002

i'm getting alittle sick of this blogger thing. of perhaps.. blogging on the whole. considering the time spent here ranting and raving, that could be used much more productively... yeah like doing my assignments... actually reading stuff and getting something useful and interesting out of it... more time sleeping too... *yawns*.

i've been acting like a neurotic jerk the past week. highly strung and stressed out, said things i shouldn't be saying and so on. like for example. during my evolution bio class, my friend made this blooper in lect. and it was pretty exasperating for others, because she kept going at it and couldn't see what was wrong with it... so i laughed. i laughed loud and hearty and then, amost immediately i noticed that no one was laughing. i was not being sarcastic, just plain tickled. *sigh* not a good explanation and besides i know i don't have anything to laugh about and the most insensitive thing is to laugh at people who are at least brave to confront what they don't know.

so other neurotic things is like last night on the bus leaving school at 7.50pm i heard someone at the back of me, talking about the class we had before. and i turned around to see who it was, being amused that (yeah i'm easily amused kaz) someone's actually talking about class. i turned back once, i turned back twice to smile at her but i don't really think i pulled it off well and now my classmate might think i'm a wierdo.

but stress or no stress, i don't want to be neurotic. it's not cute, not endearing. it's in between what i want to be and what i really am. and it can get quite embarassing at times, and i feel embarass because i don't really know how to express myself and what comes out is this twisted thing.

on the optimistic side, i made a few people laugh even if its at my expense. :)

posted by happyhannon at 11:09 AM