Thursday, May 04, 2006
something interesting happened in class today. I was illustrating to my students how to demonstrate and illustrate the importance of a role of wife and mother. It was an essay question they were doing and many of them simply could not describe this importance. Suddenly the analogy of a teacher came into mind and i decided to use that as an illustration. I said that the role of a teacher is important and how we know that it is important is because of the impact it has on others, whether for better or worse. In describing that, I used myself as an example that I as a teacher had an impact on their lives.
And that's what i'm thinking about today. Have i impacted their lives yet? It seems too early to tell as i've only known them for about 2 months. Lately, I have been harsh on them because they were not handing their work and when they did so, the quality did not meet my expectations despite the numerous times of encouragement, admonishment and warnings given. In such times, I always remind myself not to lose my control and not to vent my anger unnecessarily. I remind myself that what is more important is not that i have an emotional outlet but that they will learn from this and be better students. I only pray that they understand how much I want them to learn and grow, and be proud of what they do and are becoming.
As the year began, I prayed to the Lord and asked Him not to give me a perfect class because such a class would not need anything and there would be nothing I could really give them. Instead, I asked that He would give me students whom I can help, students who were not perfect. I asked that even though they were imperfect, that their imperfections would not overwhelm me and that He would use me in whatever way, to help them win the battles that matter. Above all, that they would know His love for them through their contact with me.
I know that's a tall order. There are so many things that I can't even manage. Just yesterday, i forgot to bring the long sleeve white shirt for my student who was entering a competition. I literally cringed at the thought of how incompetent and weak I have become. How do I help others when even in my own battles, i'm on the losing end?
Yet, even as i'm typing this, I am once again renewed with a sense of hope that what I have prayed early in the year would be fulfilled. I still do make mistakes with my students and sometimes, I don't treat them with the honesty and integrity required of someone in my profession. But I'm glad that there's a stirring in me that says "You can change" without the bitter tone of condemnation. What a priviledge to know that He "talks to me, and walks with me along life's narrow way". God knows that I need that everyday.Labels: the teacher's attendance book
