krunchypeanuts

Friday, December 20, 2002

"A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words."

i feel a little weary today. i don't normally feel like this. in fact quite rarely. i think i'm buoyed,kept afloat, most of the time by hope, faith with a mixture of naivety and ignorance.

but when you're finally faced with a cold hard fact, and you know that turning your back to it makes you a coward...

you don't want to grin and bear with it either. It's not so much of a fact but more of an answer. A reply you didn't want to hear echoed back to you, confirming your sneaking suspicions...

it's like knowing that you're gonna lose your best friend.
or the one that you love has for the last time crossed the line.
or knowing the very thing you knew you could do is really the one thing that you can't. just that procrastination never made that fact clear to you.

so what am i going to do?

... don't ask because i won't tell.

posted by happyhannon at 2:13 AM 0 comments

Wednesday, December 18, 2002

Psalm73:21-26 (King James Version)
Thus my heart was grieved,
and I was pricked in my reins.
So foolish was I, and ignorant:
I was as a beast before thee.
Nevertheless I am continually with thee:
thou hast holden me by my right hand.
Thou shalt guide me with thy counsel,
and afterward receive me to glory.
Whom have I in heaven but thee?
And there is none upon earth that I desire besides thee.
My flesh and my heart faileth:
but God is the strength of my heart,
and my portion for ever.

(Today's English Version)
When my thoughts were bitter
and my feelings were hurt,
I was as stupid as an animal;
I did not understand you.
Yet I always stay close to you,
and you hold me by the hand.
You guide me with your instruction
and at the end you will receive me
with honour.
What else have I in heaven but you?
Since I have you, what else could I
want on earth?
My mind and my body may grow weak,
but God is my strength;
he is all I ever need.

Gave the two versions, whichever is your preferred cup of tea. frankly i wish we could marry the two. "pricked in my reins" is rather outdated and the last verse of the Today's English Version lost much steam. Well, i'm looking forward to some sleeping now. just came back from meeting june. passion fruit tea at olio dome did wonders for me and helped to ease the cramps. i might need to take a panadol before i sleep. for now, gonna see how long i can tahan be4 i K.O. God's blessings to all...

posted by happyhannon at 12:23 AM 0 comments

Tuesday, December 17, 2002

how can i forget but my other girlfriend (the origins of this relationship harks all the way back to primary five charity st. nicholas) is coming back from the states. me happy :).

posted by happyhannon at 12:13 PM 0 comments

finally an update on mememe. i haven't been writing much in here because i really don't have anything to write about. don't want to complain about life because it is simply not worth my time so i've been trying to keep myself from dying of boredom instead. got kinda hooked to neopets. it's not even fun trust me. the only thing that gets me going at it is because i get to buy stuff for my neopet plushpoy. In real life i'm actually cashless and therefore powerless, this gives me a fake sense of being in control.

I've burnt my pocket money on gifts and prodigal living (starbucks wat else) and yet, there never seems to be an end to it. I've still got presents that i've yet to buy for people whom i care. like hannon's parents who don't celebrate christmas but i think (i might be presumptuous though) that they won't mind receiving some of the festive cheer. But we'll see how. when there's a will, there's a way. when you have parents and you're the only kid left at home (the other one's married), there is a way... snigger.

then there's spending time with friends that i haven't ketchup for a long long time. i've resolved to spend my last dredges of money on meeting them. Today i'm meeting my old jc girlfriend and i do miss her terribly. she recently got hitched back to this guy in my jc class. i don't really trust this guy i hope he aint playing with her or if he is, she's playing with him too. But nah, i do harbour the hope that the relationship will work out no matter wat and tat they will be together for better or worse. am i saying that i wish they will get married? well, i'm saying that i hope they won't experience another breakup anymore. you might disagree but finding the one saves a lot of heartache and unnecessary time spent on the wrong person, that could be used much more productively. very cold economic terms but time doesn't exists for men.

posted by happyhannon at 12:07 PM 0 comments

Friday, December 13, 2002

Death, be not Proud John Donne

Death, be not proud, though some have called thee
Mighty and dreadful, for thou art not so;
For those whom thou think'st thou dost overthrow,
Die not, poor Death, nor yet canst thou kill me.
From rest and sleep, which but thy pictures be,
Much pleasure; then from thee much more must flow,
And soonest our best men with thee do go,
Rest of their bones, and soul's delivery.
Thou art slave to fate, chance, kings, and desperate men,
And dost with poison, war, and sickness dwell;
And poppy or charms can make us sleep as well
And better than thy stroke; why swell'st thou then?
One short sleep past, we wake eternally,
And death shall be no more; Death, thou shalt die

posted by happyhannon at 11:12 PM 0 comments

Thursday, December 05, 2002

it rained and i felt cold the entire day. of course it really didn't help that i was wearing a spaghetti strap top and did not bring along my brown corduroy jacket... do you mind waiting for a while? i've got nothing to write at the moment but i feel like it. It's one of those nights where i don't want to go to bed so early. (11.30pm already). just bear with me for a while..
...
a long line of images
life, a series of tv screens
flashing simultaneously hundreds
of factoids accumulated
in a
single day.
i don't know what to look at,
what to make of them,
what to even say.
their cliche quips
strain every single
iota of creativity out of my being.
And this is just
a single day
you are looking at.
perhaps the temporary
death of
sleep was a better end.
....?

utter gibberish for now. but i'll be back if i'm still awake.

posted by happyhannon at 11:33 PM 0 comments

The only book which doesn't take place in Narnia at all, per se, you're the story of a voyage to find the end of the world and hopefully the Seven Lost Lords (remember Rhoop!). You contain some of the most unique people and places and beautiful descriptions of the whole series.

Find out which Chronicles of Narnia book you are.

posted by happyhannon at 11:21 AM 0 comments

i haven't been doing this for a long time. yesterday's swim was beautiful. the sun was shining strong, good light which lit up the skies in a constant shade of blue, very few clouds. i was floating and looking up at the sky, at the apartments around me. admiring at symmetry, angles that counterplayed with the wide expense of that blue sky. utterly amazing. feeling at that point in time that i could enter into a rest that i've been searching for so long. God was in my thoughts and i haven't felt so contented to be the way i was for a long time.
i feel like doing the same thing today and "worship the sun" but i've got a speech seminar to report on in the USP (university scholars program). but it's just going to be a great day even merely walking on the streets, i can't wait.

posted by happyhannon at 11:04 AM 0 comments

krunchypeanuts...once u pop u can't stop...daily trivia with a dose of social responsibility...a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down...let's say we try...oh Lord how we try...